Happy Birthday, Mommy.
Celebrating this one, Leola White Brailsford, who would have turned 80 today. I feel closer than ever to her as I understand her better and better, by and by—piecing together a life through memories of my siblings and others, through living my own life… through connecting with her spirit.
What brings me comfort right now.
Remembering moments like this one from May of last year. Amandla and I stopped outside of her fabulous loft apartment in Paris' 11th arrondissement to drink in the evening. I arrived from L.A. for a week, having been charged with ferrying Kumo the cat across the Atlantic. One year later I've just finished watching the result of Amandla's six-month rendezvous with Paris—the eight-part Netflix series, The Eddy. It’s a soul-stirring, cinematic marvel, and a poignant deep-dive into the lives of some riveting characters, including troubled Julie, played by Amandla. She is "scintillating" in the role, possesses an "arresting presence," and delivers a "scene-stealing performance," reviewers say. Plus there's this appreciation by Amy Taupin in Artforum and this gorgeous Emmy magazine cover. I may just have to stream it again.
Crown of death.
I now know how my cousin died. Eric. 38. Husband. Father. NYPD Blue.
He died in agony.
For mommy on Mother's Day.
I had to write about Mommy. It was painful at times. I was conflicted. Can one be open with another's secret? She came to me early one morning. I felt her guiding me, urging me on. Yes, I could breathe life into her story and give her life. Even in death.
I like to make stuff...and think about stuff.